Contents of The Tub's plastic bag revealed ... Groaning through a public meeting with Happy Hatzistergos ... Top notch changes heralded for Victoria
In the heat of a Sydney afternoon I see, swathed in blue serge, and looking as crisp as a Lebanese cucumber, The Hon Ian (The Tub) Callinan.
He was on the corner of King and Elizabeth Streets carrying a plastic bag containing two bottles of V8 juice.
The sad news is that he is looking incredibly thin and sleek.
"The Tub" is no longer an appropriate greeting for the elegant Queensland left-winger. I'll have to think of another courtesy title.
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To the theatrette at the NSW parliament on Macquarie Street to hear a lecture by Premier Kristina Keneally to the Institute of Public Administration Australia.
The excitement was dashed when we discover that her place will be taken by Attorney General John Hatzistergos.
But where is he? At 12 minutes past six an IPAA organiser apologised for the delay to the sparse collection of public administration enthusiasts, government minders, advisers and hacks who had been sent along to make up the numbers.
Hatz arrived soon after and spoke for barely 10 minutes.
Notwithstanding the Premier's inability to attend he said she held the IPAA in warm regard. He quoted extensively from a speech she gave to the IPAA last year and talked about a new publication the government has launched to encourage women into non-traditional jobs.
He also announced a plan to increase the percentage of employees with disabilities.
The first question was from Dorothy Dix who asked how he thought the new super-departments were travelling. The AG struggled for a minute while he leafed through a lot of papers at the lectern - he then woodenly read out the prepared screed.
An IPAA organiser asked if the government would consider mirroring the public service restructure with a political restructure so that ministries matched the agencies and CEOs would know which minister they should be dealing with.
There was a quiet titter of laughter around the room and the attorney said that was a matter for the Premier and he would "take it on notice".
Someone commented that Opposition leader Barry O'Farrell has promised a Public Service Commission - did he have any thoughts on that?
Happy Hatzistergos said that implied that the public sector is "somehow politicised", which was completely incorrect. From personal experience the advice he received was frank and fearless.
Half the audience stuffed handkerchiefs in their mouths to stall explosions of laughter.
Someone asked for examples of public sector achievements? He said he thought the public service did a good job on the much-vaunted (but now buried) State Plan, an initiative of former Premier Morris Iemma.
While delivering this answer he managed to speak about the Labor government in the past tense.
Having allocated an hour for the whole event, it was all washed-up well before 7pm. As people staggered into the evening heat, one of the bureaucrats remarked rather too loudly: "How embarrassing was that?"
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Word sweeping Yarraside is that Earl Warren is to be sent off to be Governess of Victoria while John Middleton from the Federal Court will replace her as CJ.
I'm told that Middleton is a good pal of Pat Keane CJ.
He must be all right then.