Letter from Blighty

Filling the pauses - magistrate's messaging addiction during hearings ... Algerian boxer (he/him) sues X for cyber-bullying - gender experts punch below the belt ... Judge slapped with misconduct finding over 16 month delay in costs ruling ... Floyd Alexander-Hunt files from London 

As Autumn leaves descends upon London canopies, it's clear that Summer has bit the dust ... and apparently so too is the marriage of the UK's favourite Love Island pairing, Molly-Mae Hague and Tommy Fury. 

Who'd have thought a partnership stemming from a show where the premise is about swapping partners to win a game would end up in with accusations of infidelity? Completely unexpected. 

Amid a grief-stricken Molly-Mae and British populace, Keir Starmer also decided this was the week to debut some sunny rhetoric.  

"Things will get worse before we get better." The PM outlined bleak economic conditions caused by the legacy of the Tories. Seems Britain's economy and Molly-Mae's emotional state were both left in "rubble and ruin" due to broken promises and reckless behaviour. 

Who'll be first to do a tell-all interview on the Call Her Daddy podcast – Keir, or Molly-Mae?

Magistrate's screen addiction

A magistrate has been formally reprimanded for misconduct after he used his phone and iPad to read and reply to personal messages during court proceedings. Turns out, even the judiciary has trouble resisting the allure of a red notification.

Timothy Nathan admitted to using his devices to send and receive messages related to his freelance work as a professional pilot "during the long pauses in the hearing" in March 2024. Rather ironic, given pilots are infamous for long pauses getting aeroplanes off the ground in a timely fashion. 

I digress. 

Two magistrates, on the bench with Nathan, raised concerns about his use of personal devices during the hearing. 

One of them witnessed Tim send a personal message on his iPad to his partner, who happens to be another magistrate, who was sitting at the back of the courtroom after finishing for the day. 

The tenor of the texts probably went sometime like: 

"I can see you ..."
"I can see you too!" 

Justice Keehan: reputational damage

The naughty Madge argued that his actions did not impact his performance or compromise the dignity of the court. 

The only people affected were the two magistrates sitting with him, as no other court users were aware of what he was doing. 

The Judicial Conduct Investigations Office (JCIO) noted that the guidelines for magistrates instruct that all personal devices should be turned off during court sessions. 

Like a plane, if you don't switch your phone to aeroplane mode – we are told that something very bad will happen. 

Justice Michael Keehan, representing the Lady Chief Justice and the Lord Chancellor, concurred with the JCIO's advice: 

"Mr Nathan's actions risked reputational damage to the magistracy, if it had become known to other court users what he had been doing."  

In issuing formal advice, the JCIO recognised that he had taken full responsibility for his actions and noted his "long and previously unblemished conduct record". 

Maybe as long as the pauses during the hearing. 

Olympic boxer Imane Khelif files cyberbullying lawsuit

Algerian boxer Imane Khelif has brought a legal complaint against social media platform X for alleged cyber-harassment, following the heated brouhaha about gender eligibility in the Olympics. 

The lawsuit was filed in France at the Paris Public Prosecutor's Office by Khelif's London and Milan-based legal team at Withers, led by sports head Luca Ferrari. 

Khelif won gold at the 2024 Olympics in the women's boxing 66kg division against Italian boxer Angela Carini. Khelif was criticised after her opponent Carini abandoned the quarter-final 46 seconds in, stating she had "never felt a punch like this". 

Clearly she's never tried my Nanna's festive punch (a cask of white wine, other intoxicants and a shot of orange juice).

It was revealed that Khelif was banned from competing in the 2023 boxing world championships after she failed to pass the gender eligibility test conducted by the International Boxing Association (IBA). 

The International Olympic Committee (IOC) challenged this test and revoked the IBA's recognition as the governing body for boxing in 2023. 

The IOC also removed the IBA from the Olympics due to concerns about corruption, financial transparency, and governance. 

Khelif: taking on the trolls

Khelif was born female and has never identified as transgender or intersex. The IOC clarified the situation: 

"Scientifically, this is not a man competing against a woman."

The criminal complaint claims that Khelif was the victim of "misogynistic, racist and sexist" cyberbullying on social media, especially X. 

The negative comments intensified after the usual suspects began commenting on the matter.

J.K. Rowling posted a picture of the quarter-final with the caption: 

"The smirk of a male who knows he's protected by a misogynist sporting establishment enjoying the distress of a woman he's just punched in the head, and whose life's ambition he's just shattered." 

Elon Musk, the owner of X, reshared US swimmer Riley Gaines' post emphasising that "men don't belong in women's sports". 

Musk and Rowling are both named in the lawsuit.

Donald Trump also posted a picture of the fight and promised if re-elected to "keep men out of women's sports! 

Can we also keep men like Donald Trump out of a women's jobs (Go Kamala.)

Tardy judgment

A judge has received formal advice for misconduct after taking 16 months to deliver a ruling on costs. 

Catherine Burton, a judge at the Insolvency and Companies Court, took over a year to deliver a judgment to the relevant parties. The Judicial Conduct Investigations Office (JCIO) determined that this delay "amounted to misconduct". 

A spokesmuffin explained: 

"Whilst the nominated judge [who carried out an investigation] found that several emails from the parties chasing the judgment were not referred to Judge Burton, there were still sufficient opportunities for the judge to have prepared her judgment in a timelier manner.  

"Judge Burton was aware that the judgment was outstanding and had kept the papers in her room for that purpose." 

This feels strikingly similar to earmarking recipes in a cookbook, only to order take-out; or leaving the bin next to the front door to remember to take it out ... but now the bin just lives there. 

The judge took responsibility for "the unsatisfactory state of affairs" and in her judgment publicly apologised to the parties.  

Judge Burton: latest member of the Snail Society

Burton confirmed that in future, she would "ensure cases would be automatically allocated to a future hearing where there was insufficient time to hear the matter". 

Sixteen months seems positively zippy compared to some of the snails at the WA Supremes, the FCA, and the Circus Court.