London Calling

Vitamin D deficiency ... Anti-vax solicitor birched for "friendly warning" to schools ... Budget measures hit private school fee payers and their personal jets ... Robing room "humour" ... Equality and sensitivity training missing in action ... Floyd Alexander-Hunt reports from Blighty 

As the leaves fall and the temperatures drops, it seems unavoidable that winter is around the corner. I have pulled out my trusty winter uniform – tracksuit pants, a fleece hoodie, woollen socks and sandals – so there is absolutely no hope of receiving any Vitamin D or affection from my husband. 

While the daylight hours may be limited, London is making up for it in the form of Diwali celebrations, Guy Fawkes fireworks and Christmas lights. 

Yet, the talk of the town is the Labour government's first budget in 14 years, where it committed to raising £40 billion in new taxes. 

Rachel Reeves, the UK's first female Chancellor of the Exchequer in the 800+ years of the office's existence, spent most of the news cycle defending her taxation decision: 

"In the circumstances that I have inherited, it is the right choice to make." 

I'm sure it was a particularly difficult decision to slap some taxes on private jets – a particular sting to Britain's outgoing Prime Minister ... and of course, Taylor Swift.

I too have cracked down on unnecessary spending, namely private jet travel, and will be demanding a large amount of tax (monetary Christmas gifts) in order to continue to afford living in one of the most expensive cities of the world.

Sheffield solicitor's wicked little Covid letters

Bayliss: implied threatsThe Solicitors Disciplinary Tribunal (SDT) has fined a Sheffield solicitor, Lois Bayliss, for her misconduct in sending letters warning schools against COVID-19 vaccinations and safety measures for children. 

Ironically, Bayliss chose to send these messages via the most germ-infested medium - I mean really, who sends letters anymore? 

She had previously sent letters, on the letterhead of her firm, Broad Yorkshire Law, to 450 school leaders, warning them that they may face liability if they proceeded with COVID-19 safety measures, including mask-wearing and vaccinations. 

Bayliss argued that these letters were intended to be "polite" and a "friendly warning" - similar to the passive aggressive post-it notes I used to leave my old roommate if she left crumbs on the bench. 

Bayliss said she felt that important information was being withheld about the harm of COVID-19 vaccines on children. An unsuccessful online campaign was launched lobbing the SRA to leave Lois alone and drop the complaints against her. 

The SDT found that Bayliss' behaviour constituted an abuse of her position as a solicitor, and breached professional principles by using implied legal threats. She was fined £2,500 and ordered to pay £30,000 in costs. 

Disgruntled private school parents

With the UK's budget landing this week, there was devastating news that private school fees would no longer be exempt from VAT. 

Chancellor Reeves announced that the increased revenue would help "provide the highest quality of support and teaching" in the state sector. 

Harrow lads: VAT decision is discriminatory 

She may have forgotten that the highest proportion of society guilty of saying "you'll be hearing from my lawyer" are those educated at  private schools. The main reason being, many of their mummies and daddies are indeed members of the legal profession. 

At the end of October, the Independent Schools Council (ISC), a peak body representing many private schools, voted to take legal action against this new policy. 

This judicial review of the government's decision will lean on the European Convention of Human Rights, in particular Article 2, the right to education; and Article 14, the prohibition against discrimination. 

What other Articles are there to protect the rights of boater-sporting lads or tunic-clad gels? 

Robing room banter 

Criminal solicitor Geoffrey White was reprimanded by the SDT and ordered to pay £12,000 in costs for making sexualised jokes toward a young probation officer in court. His defence? It was robing room banter!

Not to be confused with changing room chat, or dressing room drivel, the solicitor stated his behaviour was as a result of qualifying "into a culture of 'robing room banter' that made light of difficult work by relying on inappropriate humour". 

White: EDI failure

White admitted to showing the officer an inappropriate image and making insinuating comments about her, which made her feel embarrassed and uncomfortable. The SDT found he failed to act in a way that upheld public trust and confidence, or that encouraged equality, diversity and inclusion. 

He did express regret, calling his behaviour "indefensible", and admitted he had not received formal equality or sensitivity training. 

Ah yes, nothing screams decency more than requiring a formal course to not be a creep.